Weak doesn’t begin to describe the man before me, dwarfed and diminished somehow by hospital machinery, pale and wan, forced to lie flat-tilted on his back under white cotton covering.
My mighty oak of a man who had always been strong, until illness sapped him, is now made weak as sapling, drained of strength and vitality, felled by axes of adversity.
And as I gaze at him I realise it is I who needs to be strong enough now for the two of us. I have to believe my faith isn’t weak and wavering, nor my trust in God’s healing power any the less for seeing my husband in physical and emotional depletion like this.
Though my heart quakes and tears gather as I take his hand, I know he is seeking to be infused with strength and hope in the holding on. I’ve become a life-raft, an anchor in these uncertain seas.
I need a tender, compassionate heart and nerves of steel to help steer us through the post-op days ahead. My man needs me to focus less on weakness and to embrace the resilience of God’s sustaining grace.
Because the truth is when I am weak I am strong: strong in dependence and faith, strong in hope and encouragement, strong in Christ alone.
I take a deep breath, fix a smile on my face, keep the conversation flowing easy like water between us, allow anxieties to ebb a little. And I square myself on the inside with a pep talk to my soul, muttering a soft ‘you can do this’ message of faith.
You can hold onto God like you’re a drowning woman. You can hold on to the Hope only He can give you. You can hold on to His grace being sufficient enough for this day and all to come. You may feel weak but you have the courage of the Lion of Judah roaring on the inside, bolstering your faith.
Do you need strength and courage for the days ahead? Me too, my friend. Here’s what’s helping me: Trusting God to supply my every need as I daily rest myself in Him, letting go of anxiety and breathing in His peace and calm, praying, praying and praying again and accepting help from family and friends.
There is strength to be had in numbers, in friendship and fellowship with others, and you’ll find lots of that in the fabulous five-minute-friday community where I am linking my more-than-5-minute words today on the prompt ‘weak’. Just click here to join us there.