I feel ill-equipped to write about patience, considering I have so little of it. But I do know how much patience is a great teacher.
In the learning of it I’ve seen into the unsavoury depths of my insufficient soul. Bitten back bitter tears of shame and regret. Seen how deficient I am in it.
Looked rather enviously at my naturally patient husband whose usual demeanour is steadiness, whereas mine is to list this way and that with my emotions.
[bctt tweet=”I would be in a rocky place indeed without the solid Rock of Christ to lean on. #patience #inChrist #wordsofjoy “]
Maybe my despair over gaining patience is because I find myself most impatient with those I love the most. Our nearest and dearest can bring out the worst in us as well as calling forth the best.
Can I only be kind, generous, understanding, patient and forgiving with strangers? Sadly, sometimes it appears so. A little distance helps.
Wanting to be patient
But my beloved sees me at close quarters, knows all the triggers, senses how I may react and, Christ-like, he loves me anyway.
Yes, tetchy-tired as I often am, despondent and dependent, gloomy and grumpy some days. I want to be patient, I really do. God is working on it, trust me.
I’ve prayed for patience, hoping it would supernaturally fall on me like a velvety cloak. However, trials and testing abounded, situations arose fit to test the patience of a saint, challenging circumstances made me feel like I was imploding or about to explode.
[bctt tweet=”But then there is grace, vast oceans of it where I swim with sweet gratitude and relief. #grace #faith #gratitude #wordsofjoy “]
I mess up continually but God hasn’t finished with me, nor with you either, works in progress as we are. No doubt patience will have her way with us one way or another.
In my life, she seems to have morphed into her sister endurance over long years, especially while coping with chronic illness.
[bctt tweet=”Patience lays dormant as expectant seed within, ready to become fruitful, if I let it”]
Learning how to achieve patience by God’s grace
I am slowly learning to wait with better grace, sit still with less resistance, remain rested and rooted in the Vine without resorting to frustration.
And I’m glad I’m no expert in patience, because if I was a skilled practitioner of the art I’d have nothing to offer you here except smugness, and that’s another flaw waiting to be explored on another day.
Am I alone with this problem or do you sometimes struggle with impatience as well? If so, how do you overcome it and how are you learning to become more patient?
Please feel free to share your story in the comments below.
This is day 13 of write-31-days and five-minute-free-writes (where today’s prompt is: ‘patience’). Click here to read the rest of the prompts and join in if you want to.
I am grateful beyond measure that God has blessed me with words and ability to join in regularly, mostly here and occasionally over at poetryjoy.com. Thank you for accompanying me thus far. I appreciate your support more than you know.